Heard this one? We all have at some point.

Project is at risk? “I Wish You'd Said Something Sooner!”

Bowing out of a hangout? “I Wish You'd Said Something Sooner!”

Calling a relationship quits? “I Wish You'd Said Something Sooner!”

Yeah, we have our faults and make mistakes like these… But when it becomes a pattern, it may be a question of psychological safety. Show me someone who’s thrown their hands up and said “I Wish You’d Said Something Sooner!”, and I’ll show you someone who creates hostile environments without realizing it.

If you find yourself saying “I wish you’d…” just stop altogether. You wish, ok, where are we now? Oh? The same place? Gotcha, maybe it’s time to try something new then, such as introspection.

Why do you think no one talks to you? You're not safe to talk to.

They’re bad at communicating? Are you? How do you receive communication?

Keep an eye on these things, we all poison ourselves in little ways, with little tugs from our inner lizard brain, those twitch emotions and reactions. We want psychological safety for ourselves, so maybe we’re quick to dismiss an idea that conflicts. It causes real, physical discomfort.

So, really, this is just a little reminder: Create the environment and you’ll get the results.